Summary of the best book that exists on the face of planet earth

the shit they never taught you in school

this is the most underrated book today

1. in evaluating any decision we need to factor in the costs of what we choose, but also the costs of the things we pass up
2. capitalize on your losses.
3. idols: relatively ordinary people who made themselves extraordinary.
4. The Growth Mindset is the belief that the hand you’re dealt is just the starting point. You believe that your qualities are cultivated through your efforts. With the right strategy and discipline, you can improve. Through application and experience, we can get better.
5. Decide who you want to be, what you want to achieve, how you want people to remember you. Take the long term perspective. Then connect it back to your daily actions.
6. Efficiency is doing things right, but effectiveness is doing the right things. Efficiency is useful, but only after you’re effective.
7. Most people don’t actually listen; they’re just thinking about what they want to say next. To be effective, you need to be actively and empathically listening.
8. You will never change your life until you change something you do daily.
9. The only thing worse than making a bad choice is not choosing at all. If you don’t choose, then you’ve decided to be a passive receiver of whatever comes your way.
10. the rational brain knows what is necessary, but the emotional brain doesn’t want to do the hard work.
11. if you just instruct the rational part on what to do then you will have an understanding but no motivation but if you just instruct the emotional part then you have passion but no direction
12. Stop judging yourself. Take your aspirations and break them down into tiny behaviors. Embrace mistakes as discoveries and use them to move forward
13. Fake it till you become it.
14. Presence stems from believing in yourself. If we want to feel good about ourselves and progress towards our goals, we must trust our honest feelings, values and abilities.
15. Powerful people speak differently. The words come out in a slow and assured manner. They don’t rush, are unafraid to pause and take up space, and feel entitled to the time they’re using
16. ‘Confidence’ is the realistic expectation you have of being successful at a task given (a) your competence, and (b) the risks associated. An effective man is one who is confident — not arrogant, but not a cowering mess either.
17. improving yourself to become more competent in a wider variety of situations. Women want a man who is more resourceful, competent, decisive and effective.
18. Strength (physical, emotional, financial, social) makes a woman feel secure.
19. getting in shape and getting fit. read and learn new things, improve your social skills, maybe even do some mindfulness meditation, and be open to spontaneity.
20. You need to be an effective mix of the bad guy and the nice guy by being assertive but not aggressive.
21. Plug your gaps. Find your areas of weakness and work on them.
22. It’s never the environment or the events, it’s the meaning we attach to those events. This is what shapes who we are today (and what we will become tomorrow).
23. There is a difference between wanting to do something and being committed. If you truly decide, you can do almost anything.
24. We must also link the emotions of pain and pleasure to drive our actions. If there is something you know you shouldn’t be doing, bring forward some pain and link it to that behavior.
25. there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause. Who at the best knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, he fails daring greatly
26. Practice isn’t the thing you do once you’re good. It’s the thing you do that makes you good.
27. Very few people can push past those first few standard deviations and make it out to the pointy end. These people are the Outliers. If you want the benefits of being an outlier, then you need to put in the work and Go Deep to develop mastery.
28. Once you have something, it’s easier to get more of it. If you don’t have much of something, you’re going to struggle to get ahead.
29. success begets success. These extra opportunities compound to become what is known as an “accumulative advantage”. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy
30. achievement is talent plus preparation. But the more you look into it, the more you realize that ‘talent’ matters very little and ‘preparation’ accounts for the bulk of achievement.
31. Without effort, your talent is nothing more than unmet potential. Without effort, your skill is nothing more than what you could have done but didn’t.
32. Talent doesn’t mean we’re already good at something — it just means we can get better at something quicker. Talent x Effort = Skill. Skill x Effort = Achievement.
33. grit = passion * perseverance. develop practice routines ad get better each and every day
34. Being original doesn’t require being first. It just means being different and better.
35. There are two potential paths to achievement: ‘conformity’ or ‘originality’. Being a ‘conformist’ means you follow the clear path that’s ahead of you. To achieve success by being a conformist, you need to Go Deep. By using passion and perseverance, you get to 10,000 hours. Being an ‘original’ requires a unique approach. There is no path other than the one you make for yourself. Success as an original comes from Going Wide.
36. We bring our best efforts and achieve our best results when we have control over our: Task: What we do. Technique: How we do it. Time: When we do it. Team: Who we do it with.
37. If we feel like we’re getting good at something, we start to enjoy it more. The closer we get to mastering our work, the more we’re driven by the idea of constantly improving. The perfect tasks are the ‘goldilocks’ tasks: not so easy that they’re boring, and not too hard so that we feel mastery is within reach.
38. If you want to love what you do, abandon the passion mindset (‘what can the world offer me?’) and instead adopt the craftsman mindset (‘what can I offer the world?’).
39. go wide to find something you like and then go deep into that
40. trade career capital for money, freedom, or time
41. building capital: get focused, build a unique set of skills, and become indispensable
42. What we choose to focus on (and what we choose to ignore) plays in defining the quality of our life.
43. ‘Deep Work’: Professional activities performed in a state of distraction-free concentration that pushes your cognitive capacities to the limit. High quality work = time spent x intensity of focus.
44. more human, connected and mature. This person has passion, energy, sees things as they are, can handle multiple priorities at once and can make decisions without angst.
45. Some skills have greater leverage than others. By adding some specific skills to your toolkit, you can get where you want to go much faster. It doesn’t matter what type of job you have; these Big Ticket Skills are universally applicable across industries. Adding these tools to your toolkit will serve you well across the different roles you take on over the duration of your career.
46. Presentations/Speaking: Have a goal for your presentation. What can you offer your listeners? How can you give them something to help them learn and grow? It’s not about what happens during the speech; it’s about what happens when they leave the room. Make it about them. A person’s favourite subject is themselves. Your audience will be interested if it’s about them. Frame your presentation around their interests, their problems, their hopes and their dreams.
47. power frame: show a power move by not showing desperation and respecting yourself and your time
48. Nobody is going to come and save you but yourself. There is a smorgasbord of paths people have gone down to end up living life on their terms, and they all have one thing in common: they started.
49. Start copying what you love. Copy copy copy copy. At the end of the copy, you will find yourself. discovery through theft :
50. Whatever excites you, go do it. Whatever drains you, stop doing it.
51. Because so many people are quitting halfway, it becomes scarce to make it all the way through the curve and collect the pot of gold waiting on the other side. This scarcity is your friend. Generally, the longer and harder The Dip, the more people quit, and the greater the rewards at the end of the curve.
52. When faced with a Dip, many people choose to diversify to give themselves more options. If you can’t get to the next level in your pursuit, you think you should spread your efforts
53. the resistance is inevitable, invisible, internal, universal, most powerful at the finish lines
54. Take Action To Benefit From Randomness If success is random, your aim should be to capture as much randomness as possible. You can do things to make this randomness work for you.
55. a ‘Click Moment’ is that spark of an idea or the point where your thinking ‘clicks’ into place and things appear clear.
56. You should follow your curiosity as much as possible, even if it takes you to weird places. You should learn a new skill that piques your interest. You should go to more events, meet more people, take in new ideas, try new hobbies, and test out any business ideas you get. Rejecting the predictable path and following the bizarre is the way to invite more click moments into your life.
57. People don’t buy what you do, they buy why you do it.
58. Marketing is a battle of perceptions, not products. It’s better to be first than it is to be better. If you can’t be the first, create a new category you can be first in.
59. Attractiveness, similarity, compliments, contact, and cooperation can make a person more influential.
60. Every successful business creates something of value. Attracting attention to build demand. Bringing in enough money to make your effort worthwhile.
61. Marketing is getting them to notice you. Sales is getting them to pay you.
62. A human of noble character. A lion that nobody wants to fuck with. A fox that can avoid traps and play the games behind the scenes.
63. four tendencies:
64. There’s zero correlation between being the best talker and having the best ideas.
65. Introverts: Drawn to the inner world of thoughts and feelings, focus on the meaning they make of the events around them, ‘recharge’ by being alone. Extroverts: Drawn to the external life of people and activities, plunge into the events themselves and feel drained if they don’t socialize enough.
66. Lessons, get better with age. If an idea has survived for hundreds or even thousands of years, it must be for a pretty good reason.
67. Assets are things that do not require your time but put money into your pocket: stocks, bonds, income-generating real estate, royalties from IP, a cash flow positive business, and so on.
68. learning to choose well in a world of unlimited possibilities is harder still, perhaps too hard.
69. As our confidence grows in our understanding, the more exposed we become to events that come from the unknown. Thinking you understand the world can paradoxically be our biggest liability.
70. Acknowledging that you don’t know everything leaves you open to new experiences and reduces your risks of overcommitting to the wrong path.
71. No matter how dedicated you are to learning, you’ll never grasp the complexity of the world. You need to be more confident in your ignorance than in your certainty.
72. If We can become aware of these forces, if we can realise the limitations of our rationality and understand how vulnerable we are to manipulation, then perhaps we can take back control of our Dark Side.
73. Your self-image comprises all your opinions, how you look at the world and the things you value. You’ve crafted it yourself as a way to feel validated from within.
74. The people you deal with are wearing masks, so they are rarely what they appear to be. Deep below that polite exterior is a dark side consisting of all their insecurities and the aggressive, selfish impulses they want to conceal from public view. The overt traits like saintliness or toughness are usually covering the opposite quality.
75. This shadow contains your deepest insecurities, your secret desires to hurt people (even those close to you), your fantasies of revenge, your suspicions about others, and your hunger for more attention and power.
76. You constantly compare yourself to the status of your peers. You measure yourself against the people you encounter, noticing any differences between what they have and what you have.
77. When you are envious, you won’t like to admit inferiority. You will typically create a narrative instead, finding an excuse to why the other person is doing so much better.
78. If someone is genuinely doing better than you, see it as an opportunity to learn and improve, not to become bitter and resentful. Envy then becomes an opportunity, rather than a hurdle.
79. to develop the ability to detach ourselves from the group and create some mental space for true independent thinking.
80. Grand strategy is the art of looking beyond the present battle and calculating ahead. Focus on your ultimate goal and plot to reach it.
81. When conflict arises, what is your response? Do you avoid it? Lash out? Turn sly? Become manipulative? Shut-down? Or even cry? In the long run, these responses are counterproductive. If we aren’t dealing with conflict rationally, it could very well make the situation worse.
82. Without being paranoid about it, realise that some people out there don’t want the best for you. This could include being aggressive, evasive, standing back or taking action. You may even turn this enemy into a friend. The worst thing you can be is a naive victim.
83. By questioning your enemies motives and making them appear evil, you can narrow their base of support and room to maneuverer. Aim at the soft spots in their public image, exposing any hypocrisies on their part. Never assume that the justice of your cause is self-evident, publicise and promote it.
84. If you are unsure of a course of action, do not attempt it. Your doubts and hesitations will infect your execution. Timidity is dangerous: better to enter with boldness. Any mistakes you commit through audacity are easily corrected with more audacity. Everyone admires the bold; no one honours the timid.
85. We are survival machines — robot vehicles blindly programmed to preserve the selfish molecules known as genes.
86. How do you cause people to believe in an imagined order such as Christianity, democracy or capitalism? First, you never admit that the order is imagined
87. The present is the past rolled up for action, and the past is the present unrolled for understanding.
88. Questions you cannot answer are usually far better for you than answers you cannot question
89. The human tongue is a beast few can master. It strains constantly to break out of its cage, and if it is not tamed, it will run wild and cause you grief. Power cannot accrue to those who squander their treasure of words
90. There is no good or bad without us, there is only perception. There is the event itself and the story we tell ourselves about what it means.
91. Every situation that blocks our path presents a new path for a new part of us.
92. Negative visualization/Pre mortem: what is the worst that can happen and how can I prevent that
93. When we aspire: our ego leads us to strive too far, expect too much, and assume that we’re deserving — all before we’ve done any work.
94. When we succeed: our ego makes us push further and chase the wrong things, making our success far shorter and less fruitful.
95. don’t do that undisciplined pursuit of more
96. Men of great ambition have sought happiness… and have found fame. Although their initial intention was to get better for the sake of their happiness, Ego soon took over and shifted their goals.
97. When you fail: your ego crushes any attempts to try again, not wanting to risk a similar fate.

That’s it!!!